It's Complicated Hello, I wanted to tell a story in hopes someone would read. It's a story between me and this really amazing fella who I'm just going to . and I have been friends for a couple of years and I always went out of my way for him like, buying things he needed, just making sure he ate, or kicking someone's ass because they would give him problems. Don't get me wrong he went out of his way for me as well. After a while we got close and started talking about all of things like his past girlfriends, schools, and a lot of other personal things. I began to grow feelings for him as time progressed and I knew me and him would never be so, I let that dream go. I thought to myself "if I can't be with him, I'll just have to be there for him at least", and that was something I was okay with until recently. I was sitting in the car when he started to tell me that he's had the feelings for me that he can't explain and, me hearing this I immediately said " shut up, you're such a loser" . I thought he was kidding but an hour past and he became more and more serious. He began holding my hands and touching me in a way he's never touched me(not sexually). I admitted my feelings and we started getting closer within seconds, it felt unreal like I couldn't believe that this was happening. I looked at him and thought, I really love this guy. Seconds later he kissed me and all the in my body rushed to my feet. It was if it were my very first kiss, I grabbed him and we kissed more. So much happened in two hours and he kept asking how I felt about it. I told him that I was okay with it and he was as well(or so I thought). Two days have gone and he tells me that it was wrong and we shouldn't have done it, I felt like shit because I didn't regret anything a big man in Ontario California because I truly love him, I'm in love with every part of him. I told him it didn't feel right either which was a lie. He told me he didn't want to hurt me or mess anything up but he kind of did in a way. I can't think about anything else and he refuses to talk about it. He went from being like a brother to someone i can't imagine life with out. I'm and a bit confused.
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